Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Things People Told Me (or that I once read)

[written as the status update of a friend's facebook]

"it's all fun and games till someone starts espousing modalism…"

Monday, February 8, 2010

Beautify the Ship or Set Sail?

Sometimes I wonder if I'm a part of a movement that is more focused on maintaining the beauty of the ship than setting sail. I wonder where Jesus would be in this process. David Wilcox sums it up pretty well with this song. Be the mercy.

Monday, February 1, 2010

A Confession Part 2

So, I've worked hard to be home with the family as much as I can. I've lived up to my goal of working close to 40-45 hours a week. Sounds great right? Well, what's the point of being home if I am not mentally present? Every once and I while I wake up and realize that I haven't really spent time with my family even though my body has been in the same room as them. Two weeks ago I decided to stop distracting myself with fun but meaningless vices (like video games) and really try to make the most of those moments. You know what, I've had a blast! Tammie is fun and constantly teaching me how to live life in a more healthy manner. Q man is CRAZY and hilarious. We've played catch, read books, wrestled, drawn, built things, and laughed.

I don't want to miss moments like this

A Confession Part 1

I have written multiple times on the beauty and the necessity of slowing down and absorbing every moment in life. The truth is, I am not very good at it. I write these essays to remind myself of these important concepts.

There are two traps I fall into:
1) Wishing away the present
2) Working so hard I miss out on the present

I think I first started falling into trap one when I was in high school. I was always excited when school started because I could see my friends. Then I "couldn't wait" until football season was over because I was too tired. Then I "couldn't wait" until Christmas came because I was tired of school. Then I "couldn't wait" until Christmas was over because I missed my friend. The cycle went on and on until I arrived at college after not being able to wait and found myself miserable. At that moment I had two choices. I could either continue to miss out on the present and live in a false reality or I could finally deal with the stuff I was trying to run from. Truthfully, most of the time I find myself being tossed back and forth from both.

Trap two is seductive because it is an evil for which we are applauded. At times I get sucked into this trap because I am a driven person who loves planning and working hard. That is just how I am wired. However, other times, behind my "driven" mask is a person who just wants to prove his worth. The truth is, my insecurity has brought me much success over the years in athletics, academics, music, and ministry. But the ugly side of this driven nature is an inability to enjoy relationships, absorb life, and be thankful.

Here are a few words of wisdom that have helped me work through the above weaknesses:
1. Nobody applauds you for taking care of yourself. But how can you serve for the long haul if you run at that pace?
2. No matter where you run you'll always have your past and your pain. Process through the pain so that you can learn, grow, and be freed.
3. "Abandon your plans of escape and be where you are. Plant gardens, live, and live well. Life is truly a gift." - Kyle Lake
4. "I have come that you would have life - life abundantly." - Jesus

(note: I signed on to write another blog but this one became HUGE. I'll post part 2 in a few days)