1 of the 5

Recently I've been reminded that I am not a self-made man. In fact, nobody is a self-made person. Women and men have come before us and made great sacrifices to help us have what we have. When I look at my life I can point to dozens of men and women who God has used to shape me. There is nothing I can do to adequately express how thankful I am for those who loved me, mentored me, sacrificed for me, listened to me, and took risks for me. The thing is, all of us are called to live this way towards others. This is particularly true for followers of Jesus. Every adult who has a church home is charged with the ministry of children and youth. Here is a video I recently made to help teach this principle. I got the concept from a book/movement called Sticky Faith.

Imagine what it would be like if every student who attends your church graduates high school knowing they have 5 adults from the church they can always rely on. How can you be 1 of the 5?

Take Time to Be an Engaged Parent

Take time to be an engaged parent.
Take time to cultivate.
Take time to dance.
Take time to pray.
Take time to heal.
Take time to play.
Take time to cry.
Take time to listen.
Take time to laugh.
Take time to say I'm sorry.
Take time to say you're forgiven.
Take time to be fully present.
Take time to hug.
Take time to learn.
Take time to teach.
Take time to shape.
Take time to affirm.
Take time to discipline.
Take time to be transformed.
Take time to be an engaged parent.

Remember, hovering over your child is not the same thing as being engaged.
Remember, keeping your child busy is not the same thing as being engaged.
Remember, nobody is perfect. There is much power in learning how to forgive and be forgiven.

It's Safe Here

In the book Hurt 2.0 Chap Clark describes the state of today's adolescents. From the title, I'm sure you can tell it is a heavy book to read. In one of the appendices Clark identifies three groups of teens who are at the margins of adolescents. They are the most at risk kids.

The groups are as follows:

• Kids with special needs
• Kids who are raised in poverty
• Kids who are raised in extreme wealth

I work with the last group. Like all people, these students long to be loved and long to fit. However, in this particular group, they are only allowed to be perfect. In this group, an 85 on a test is not good enough. In this group, it is frowned upon to go to community college. The more I walk through life with these kids, the more I realize that these kids are not allowed to be human. To be human is to live in the tension of beautiful and ugly, full of life and full of pain, hopeful and hopeless, and good and evil. Simply put, we cannot escape our brokenness. However, we also cannot escape the fact that we were made in God's image.

One of the biggest problems that this world view creates is that these kids do not know how to mess up with grace. They feel every minor mistake deeply, as though it is a character flaw.  Kids all over the country are literally dieing because they cannot put up with the pressure. Kids all over the country are literally dieing because they can't be perfect enough.

The good news for these kids is that their worth is not determined by their gpa or by the prestige of the college they attend. The good news for these kids is that they don't even have to go to college to be considered persons of worth.

May we all have the courage to not project our insecurities on children and teens. May we all have the courage to create safe spaces where children and teens can thrive. May we have the courage to love.